Marc leaves and takes the laptop. Arg!
I missed him like crazy but it was nice to have some time to myself. After Baby J went down for the night I kicked back and did a lot of reflecting, reading, learning and relaxing.
I wasn’t able to take a lot of pictures of what I was eating but rest assure it was all clean! Ummm, except that small portion of coconut sorbet I had… but it was sure good!
I created a few awesome salads using left over couscous and chicken but for some reason I cannot find my camera cord to upload the pictures! ARG x 2!
So I wanted to delve into a little side not of my weight and goals.
I admit: I weigh myself on a daily basis. For years though I wouldn’t even touch one and I would close my eye’s when I would go to the doctors office. It would depress the hell out of me for days and I would turn to drastic measure’s to “get the weight off fast”. Unhealthy eating habits and ways of thinking played with my head and it was a constant roller coaster. I was torturing myself.
When I became pregnant I knew that I had to stop thinking about what the scale would say and become healthy for my child. I threw every negative thought about my weight away. I ate what I wanted and had no remorse. Unfortunately, I gained over 50 pounds during those 9 months, the scale was hovering at almost 200 pounds the last week of my pregnancy!
I am 5’2″ and that extra weight put my body through hell! I was sore, felt miserable but I was still not mad at myself. Granted, I retained A LOT of water. My ankles and feet were so swollen that I was not able to wear shoes, only flip flops.
I needed that mental break from myself. And knowing that it would be a long road to getting my body back to it’s normal size helped me to be patient and embrace my new body. I created a human!
The weight slowly started to come off without me having to do much. I was feeling 100 times better now that I was able to sit, bend over and function as a normal person. After a few months of recovery I knew it was time to get the ball moving and start exercising once more. As a gift, Marc bought me 12 personal training sessions at the Golds Gym located by our home. The first weigh in I was at 149. I was shocked to see the number as this was the first time I had weighed myself since giving birth but losing 51 pounds in 4 months without trying amazed me!The training was exactly what my mind and body needed! I missed the burn, the sweat, the intensity immensely! My trainer was very impressed about how quickly my body was able to bounce back after not lifting a weight in over a year, and frankly so was I. Marc saw results quickly and I was able to cruise through my sessions. He kept adding resistance each time I would see him and commend me on my abilities. My mood improved and so did my relationship with my body.
Today I weigh 128, give or take a few pounds. I am finally happy with this! But with all that extra weight and belly came extra skin. I am no where near the tightness that I want to be at and I still do have quite a bit of extra fat lingering around my mid section and legs.
However, my mental image is more positive and I am very proud of what I was able to do – create a miracle!